Is this a good Personal Narrative?

I really enjoyed reading this. You had the hook in there; I could tell because I couldn't stop reading. Your narrative caught my attention. I have no clue what the title should be. The only problem I had while reading this was the mechanics. You have some commas and periods missing. There were times when I would get confused by what you were trying to say. Also, I loved that you went back and forth between the "present" and your experiences/memories of your grandfather. I like that format. Other than that, it was well done. GOOD JOB! (: