Am I an a$$ho.le for not wanting to attend a funeral?

Could be but as we grow up there are some things we have to do even if we don't want to. You could just attend the viewing and not the funeral or if seeing her really bothers you then I would suggest doing something in remembrance of her like donating to the cancer society or an organization that she loved. Many times people don't want to tell loved ones about their cancer especially if it is found too late. people grieve in different ways but I see what your saying about mooching.Whatever you do,support your mom and let her know you care about her. Speaking or not she must have meant something if she agreed to speak at the funeral. I get what you're saying funerals most definitely suck.